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Reaching Your Peak

Dear Philippa:

I've been thinking about joining a singles adventure club to meet someone. Do you think this is a good way to find a special woman to date? I love rock climbing and rollerblading and it would be great to have someone to share this with.

�Rocky, San Francisco, California

 

Dear Rocky:

It sounds like you would have a lot in common with the members of an adventure club, and that it would be a good way to meet people who share your favorite pastimes. If your primary reason for joining is to meet a special woman, not just friends, you need to weigh the costs of joining the club against the opportunities for meeting the kind of women you're looking for. See if you can attend the club as a guest and find out for yourself if there are women in this club who might fit your criteria. If this isn't possible, ask for the names and numbers of three club members and then call them-ask them to describe the types and mix of people they have been meeting at club functions.

Define the other qualities and interests you want a woman to have-you're probably going to do more than just rock climbing and rollerblading in your relationship. You may want to find someone who appreciates the experience and rush you get from your activities, not necessarily someone with just your rock climbing or rollerblading experience. You might also want to broaden your scope to include women who want to be introduced to your interests while you learn theirs. Remember, having specific interests in common is not the basis for overall compatibility. You probably want to meet someone who will share all of life's adventures, not be just a rollerblading and rock climbing buddy of the opposite sex. I think you are on the right track by trying to meet people at places where you can just be yourself. Compare the club you're looking at to other venues for the likelihood of meeting a special woman. Rocky, listen to your instincts-you'll know what feels right.

Happy adventures, Rocky.

 

 

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